Success is an Iceberg

Positive Thinking

I am a negative person. This doesn't help when I am training for a fight. My own negativity is killing my ability to progress. I stopped training for two months, and when I went back and I expected myself to be where I left off and I wasn't. Everyone else kept training. So my own head races as I'm training with negative thoughts.

"Everyone is better than me."

"I'm shit."

"I'm like a beginner."

"I can't do anything right."

"I shouldn't of gotten caught with that."

These thoughts stay with me for the walk home, weighing me down, and they are in my head as I try to sleep.

I get the pep talk from my boyfriend on how I need to stop being negative and start being positive. It's all in my head. I agree until next time and as soon as I start doing things wrong or feel like I'm being beat up by anyone it all comes back and I feel too disheartened to try.

I've been searching online for articles about positive thinking. I'm trying to make myself believe in myself. So far this is what I've gathered.....

Did I eat well today? Did I run before training? Did I train hard enough? Did I do core work? Did I go to bed early? If I'm answering yes then I should go forward believing in my own abilities. There's no point in worrying about what my opponent can do, it only matters what I can do. If I am happy with my own training then that should give me all the confidence I need.

I'm also trying to take a leaf out of Conor McGregor's book and be half as confident as he is. I'm trying to use some of his phrases as my mantra. "We're not here to take part, we're here to take over." That's one of my favorite ones. I love that fighting Irish spirit.

Tired much?

So this week I turned it up a notch which is something I should have done about two weeks ago!! I went for a run every weekday before training and when I say run I mean jog as I am no Usain Bolt. It was about 6k every night. I even skipped training on the Wednesday night and just did the jog and every single night I was fit to collapse when I got home.

Guess what I GAINED WEIGHT!! I feel thinner and I should be at least the same weight if anything but I somehow managed to gain weight. I was ready to kick the weighing scales off the balcony this morning!!! But I couldn't because my legs are so stiff and tired :-)

Excuses

FIGHT LIKE YOU HAVE NEVER LOST AND TRAIN LIKE YOU HAVE NEVER WON - iman barlow

Monday Motivation

MOTIVATION MONDAY

Me and my Big Fat Sweaty Tomato Face

As if puffing and panting through pads isn't enough!! As if wearing a big baggy t-shirt in the heat  because I'm too ashamed to wear a vest top isn't enough!! My face is SCARLET after about 2 rounds on the pads. Sometimes I forget about it too until I go to the changing room and see my face. I throw water over it franticly and pat it with a wet towel and it cools a little but it's still glowing. It stays that way too for about an hour or two.

But I'm not entirely a freak. Fun Fact -when you exercise your blood vessels dilate and carry more blood to the skin's surface which causes you to sweat and cool off. This can lead to a flushed face which is more noticeable in fair skinned people like myself. (Of course it can also be a sign of an extremely unfit person).

So although I may look like I'm about to have a heart attack I'm actually not. Unfortunately it's one of those embarrassing things that I have to deal with. It's only reeeeeally bad if somebody points it out- so take note DON'T TELL ME I ALREADY KNOW!!!!

How I feel walking into the gym in my new Thai shorts

Anti-social Side of Muay Thai

It's now 2 years since we moved to Canada. This will be my first summer doing a Monday to Friday job so ideally it's perfect to enjoy the beautiful summer weather here in Vancouver. We live by the beach, we have a balcony and we have a bqq,  we have settled and made some friends. But it's not what I want to do with my summer.

I don't want to let any more time pass by me without fighting. I'm 32 now and I'm conscious of getting older. Also I've been through so many jobs here in Canada that I'm hoping everything turns out ok in this one so I can stay there purely because the hours suit me for training purposes. 

I will miss out on things like nights out, meals out, volley ball on the beach during the week. I will be saying a lot of  "No, I can't, I'm training tonight." It's hard to expect people to understand when you say no about 5 times in a row. It's impossible for anyone to get the dedication involved in training for a fight. I find that people who are into fitness themselves and compete in something like marathons or triathlons will be more forgiving than those who don't really exercise at all. So it's no surprise when people get fed up of you and stop asking you to do things. I can do things it's just I'm limited on what they are and try to do them on my night off from training.

I try to come up with things like "how about a coffee before training" or "Ok sushi at the weekend, I'm finished training at such and such a time." "I'll go out but i'll just have a coke, I'm not drinking because I'm training in the morning." I must sound like such a boring pain in the ass.

It's probably why people in Muay Thai end up with partners and a circle of friends who are into the sport too because they are the only people who would understand why the other is training all the time. They can share the obsession. 

I don't feel like I'm missing out on much though. I went out and drank a lot in my early 20's so I want my early 30's to be about something else. I will of course look forward to that drink when my fights are over and I can look back and be proud of myself for being dedicated and stepping into a ring when so many people in the world will never know what that feeling is like. 

"There are no short-cuts to any place worth going"

FANTASY VERSUS REALITY

HOW I THOUGHT MY FIGHT WAS SEEN BY EVERYONE 

MY FIGHT WHEN I WATCHED BACK THE RECORDING 

THIS IS HOW I FEEL HOLDING FOR LEG KICKS FOR MY BOYFRIEND

Lazy Lorraine

I am a lazy person by nature when it comes to exercising. Especially the last few months since I've being working in an office. It's my first time having a job where I sit down all day for my whole shift. While the regular Monday to Friday hours are great for training, the sitting part has made me more lazy than ever.

Once I plonk my arse on the couch when get home (with all intentions of doing some form of exercise) I just can't get up and end up watching TV for the night.

With watching TV comes the craving for something to eat and that leads me to dragging myself into the kitchen to get my hands on whatever I can eat or else pop to the shop for a little munching session. I have become the human Homer Simpson these last 2 months. It's something I can easily slip into on and off over the years. Time to put Lazy Lorraine away for as long as possible!

Mid Week Motivation

Taken from John Wayne Parr's facebook page today

Food List

I always struggle when trying to eat healthy. I LOVE EATING!!

Basic must get items

porridge

skimmed milk

rice cakes

apples, bananas, watermelon and manderins

low fat yogurt

cottage cheese 

sweet potato

whole weat rice, pasta or cous-cous

tomato pasta sauce

eggs

whole wheat bread

frozen fruit and peanut butter for smoothies

tuna

beans

chicken fillets

veg

spices for stir-frys

A new item for my list of basics is Shirataki noodles. A girl in world told me about these low calorie and low carb noodles so off I went to a local Asian store to get them. I had them with a stir-fry and I thought they were really nice. This is a picture of the type I bought.

Motivation Monday

 New gear always gets me motivated to go back training.

My reaction when the new thai gear arrives in the post

No Pain Just Weight Gain

So after the tournament I had a 2 week trip back to Ireland which meant I was missing out on another tournament. So what did I do? Stopped training. I knew I was going to be pigging out at home anyway on all the junk food that I missed so I was feeling like "What's the point?" I also froze my membership in the gym to save myself some money. I've had about 2 months off with no Thai boxing and just the odd jog and some walks. I'm terrible for putting off diets. I feel like it needs to be a Monday and it needs to be when I'm Thai-boxing.

ST PATRICK'S DAY GOLD

I did it.Fought again. While every Irish person I knew in Vancouver was out boozing for Paddys Weekend I was in the hairdressers getting my fight hair done. Even though I was going to be wearing headgear I just didn't want to worry about pony tails falling out. One less thing to worry about. Early start that morning to go and get weighed in. I even ate a breakfast because I knew it was going to be a long day. Weighed in at 160lbs at around 9.30am. Didn't fight until about 4.30pm.

Women's kickboxing were the last to fight in the whole tournament. I ate about 3 snickers that day. I was so sick with nerves. Then I'd sit there enjoy watching some fights, forget about my fight and then remember and get nervous all over again. What I was getting worked up about was so stupid too. One thing for instance was if my opponent wanted to touch gloves and then I'd touch them and she's hit me straight away. Then I was getting worried about not touching gloves and looking like a bitch. The fights were also on mats was well not a ring so I was wondering about running off the mat and what would happen then. I really tortured myself to the point where I was starting to thing maybe I should just run out the door and forget about it all. 

There was me and two other women in my gym in the same weight category, there was 7 in our division in total. Both girls from my gym fought first and I weirdly relaxed as I watched them. All of a sudden it was my turn and I was putting on the shitty pair of 14oz gloves that they gave us to wear I instantly felt panicy. The gloves were cheap and shit. Flashback of my first taste of getting boxed to death at a demo with cheap gloves. No time to reminisce of the past though as it was time to fight. No bell no frills at this show, the ref tells you to fight and you shuffle to the centre of the mat and bang.

Off I went and my thought were "Oh my God this is really happening" and she hit me and I didn't feel a thing and I hit her back as hard as I could. I never stopped going for her for the whole round. I also never heard a damn thing I was in my own world. My eyes were on her and my mind was on hitting non-stop. Each fight is 90seconds so there was no time for hanging around. At the end of the fight they throw a towel onto the mat instead of ringing a bell. My hand was raised. Best feeling in the world.

I had one round out and in I was again to fight a girl who got a free pass into the semi final over the odd number. She was tall and lean and I did feel a bit intimated because she was fresh and had just watched me but as soon as that "bell" went I was in my own world again. She hit me first which really annoyed me as I wanted to be the first to hit but I instantly jabbed her back and ended up chasing her around for the whole fight. I was much stronger than she was. I had no fear whatsoever of her. When my hand was raised again I was so happy. I never imagined I'd win two in a row. 

Motivation Monday

Motivation Monday